Newbie baby

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This topic contains 22 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  ashleee 1 year, 1 month ago.

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  • #1364 Reply

    Samantha V.

    hi i’m new to being a sugar baby. i want to meet up with this guy but he says he does not want to compensate me on our first coffee get-together. what should I do?

  • #1382 Reply


    Hey! I’m new to sugaring in the Philadelphia area and was wondering if there’s a list somewhere of men that previous sugar babies have had bad experiences with that I should be aware of. Thank you!

    • #1383 Reply


      on tumblr just type in “sd blacklist” or “sugar daddy blacklist” (or whatever other variation to this there is. also, you can type in something along the lines of “philadelphia sugar daddy blacklist” into google.

  • #1873 Reply


    Hi all! I am new to the sugar bowl, a recent transplant in a huge, expensive city. I’m 24 and a broke student. I took a dip a couple years ago but never got too far (only went on a couple of m&g’s that never turned into anything.) Within the first few days here, I began talking with a man whom I immediately felt really good about. Conversation flowed, he was charming. I met him a few days later. He’s just as charming in person, and very handsome. I’d have sex with him without compensation kind of handsome. Of course, he is married- and looking for a mostly physical relationship with lots of discretion. I did not anticipate this, but I agreed. We talked about life, ideologies, exchanged flirting over about 30-40 minutes and then he had to go. He slipped me $300 and dipped. I. Was. Blind-sided. How could my first meet have gone so damn well, despite my research and anticipating it going in the other direction?

    So anyway, we arrange to meet again about a week later. Meanwhile, he’s texting me about all of the dirty things he wants to do to me. We have not discussed allowance or any of the hard details yet. So I go to meet up with him at a hotel, he makes me a drink and we chat a little. I see a stack of bills of the table and he says to put that in my purse when I get a second. It’s $500. I’m delighted. He puts his hands on me, it felt like something out of a movie. Sex was amazing. We laughed and had a lot of fun. It felt really good. He says he wants to meet me 2-3 times/month and doesn’t care what I do or whom I date outside of him and tells me that the only other person he is sleeping with is his wife.

    My question is, why do men who are actively sleeping with their wives still seek out sugar babies? Is it because they have the money and they can? Initially, I thought that his wife wasn’t providing sex for him but I can’t imagine what I could for him that his wife can’t. Is that something I shouldn’t think about, even? Am I letting my imagination drive me crazy?

    • #1875 Reply


      Some men just like variety or may be a little wary of sharing things they’d like to try with someone they have to look at over breakfast each morning

      • #1877 Reply


        How is it after 100,000 years of experience women still don’t get it that all men just LIKE to have multiple women? Like bull elks and their herds? Biology?

    • #1879 Reply


      So he handsome, charming and provides a nice allowance. He provides you discretion for your vanilla relationships, and expects the same from you. You should appreciate the fact he is married, if he wasn’t, he wouldn’t need to provide an allowance. Would you prefer this married man or a much older, unattractive SD but single SD? Most deadbedrooms situations are not zero sex, but there is very little sex and not good enough. If he is still having sex with his wife, he may not be satisfied with it. The frequency could be once in a few months instead of few times a week. There could be lack of passion, and it feels like a chore.

    • #1881 Reply


      swoon! he sounds amazing (he sounds like a POT i’m talking to, wish me luck… maybe we’re talking about the same guy ;P). I think one reason men seek out a SB is that there’s an element of excitement to it — a breath of fresh air kind of thing.

  • #1519 Reply


    Around how much should I expect as an allowance from a platonic SD or POT?

    • #1520 Reply


      It really varies. If you’re not happy with an offer though just don’t accept it. Negotiate or just pass and move on to the next. When it comes to being platonic, sometimes you have to be super patient.

  • #1828 Reply


    Hi there everyone, Ive been lurking around for a while and am getting closer to some potential meet and greets with SDs. Ive read so many stories of guys who just lure girls in when in reality they dont have two pennies to rub together. Is there a good way to make sure this isn’t the case? Any advice is greatly appreciated.

    • #1832 Reply


      Another thing that might be helpful to do is figure out their profession and what tier they are at (CEO, VP, etc?). Google the average salary for that position and their take home after tax based on where they live. If they seem to be offering you an amount that pretty much wipes out their net pay be suspicious. Is their take home 4k and their offering you 3? Something is wrong there. Focus on the net rather than the gross. It also give you a better idea of how much you can negotiate for.

    • #1831 Reply


      The only sure way to know is cash in your hand. No money, no honey. Scammers, fakers and pump and dump artists can have 1 nice suit and rent a fancy car. A millionaire could be wearing casual and driving a pickup truck.

  • #1830 Reply


    These aren’t full proof signs but can hint at someone’s legitimacy or not. They’re full of shit if…
    1. They brag a lot about how wealthy they are
    2. They promise you too much before they’ve even met you
    3. They talk about how many women are after them so you must -jump through this hoop to be considered- (especially as an opening line in a message)
    4. They try and get you to put money down on anything (e.g. a hotel)
    5. They’ve maxed out income and net worth (especially if they’re really young)
    6. They put a sense of urgency in needing to meet them (just like a sales tactic to make you think you’ll miss out if you don’t DO IT NOW)
    7. Not flexible in terms of payment “oh I can’t PayPal, I can only make payments through your bank”
    8. Copy and paste messages (especially if it’s obvious they didn’t even read your profile)
    9. If they flinch at an expensive bill

    Green flags:
    Writes a sincere message
    1. Pictures of themselves…in multiple locations, usually traveling pics, nice hotel backgrounds, being on a boat, doing an expensive activity, in first class on a plane, wearing nice clothing etc.
    2. They travel frequently (as seen with different login locations on their profile)
    3. Writes a profile about who they are as a person not about how much money they have other than general statements (“I’ve been fortunate…”)
    4. They have a credit card known for high limits or expensive annual fees
    5. If they live in an expensive area/neighborhood/house/has multiple houses
    6. They don’t offer too much too soon but wait to make an offer when they see you two have chemistry
    7. They also give you cash before anything sexual happens (I.e. No promise to go to an ATM after, no promise of pay paling/venmoing, they should do that then and there)

    There are some others that I may add to the list later but these are the ones that came to my head immediately. You sometimes can never really know. Even if someone is wealthy they may not want to pay an allowance. This is up to you to ask/determine/negotiate and it’s never real till you actually have the money.

  • #44604 Reply

    Vanilla creme

    I’m traveling this weekend and have two long overlays , do you think the airport is a good place to free style ? Any advice ? I’m also thinking of purchasing a airline lounge pass

    • #44605 Reply

      positive panties

      Go for it babygurl !!!

  • #44621 Reply


    Should i use a sideline number when sugaring or do i have to give them my real number?

    • #44622 Reply


      I would usually exchange emails with them first, especially with the married ones. But once we have established our relationship, I give my real name/number.

  • #44623 Reply

    dr. mary

    Can I be a sugar baby if I’m still in medical school?

    • #44624 Reply

      dr. mary

      Of course! An educated woman with ambition is sexy as hell!

  • #44733 Reply


    Recently I’ve been talking with a POT and he is quite keen on meeting me. I’d love to meet him but I still don’t know if I’m ready yet. I don’t want him to think I’m easy. We seem to get on well though. We’ve been textin and messaging for about 2 weeks? What should I do?

    • #44734 Reply

      Mrs. B

      Gurl, you DO NOT, I repeat, YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING if you aren’t ready. Do what your heart tells you to do. If you’re new to sugaring, it can be quite intimidating to meet your POT for the first time. BUT that being said, remember you will eventually have to meet your POTS if you decide to start sugaring or because no men will be interested in just sending messages and texts. Good luck!!! xx

      • #44735 Reply


        Thank you so much for the advice. I really appreciate it 🙂

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